Hope & Inspire

According to Atticus, “I worry there is something broken in our generation; there are so many sad eyes on happy faces.” This quote is somehow painfully true. There are so many things that are wrong with her that she does not know what it is or how to explain it even. She tried putting it off because she does not want to come to terms with it. She has always been good at running away when things get worse. She prefers not dealing with it. She does not want to put herself through the pain. That is how she had been dealing with it all this time. She knows that is not the best way to deal with it but she got used to it and frankly, she has no idea how else to deal with it. She is doing what is best for her even though it might not be the best thing for her. She knows that too. She can’t quite figure out what is wrong with her. Is she going through depression? Anxiety? Bipolar disorder? Or is she going crazy? Or is she just fine? Which one is it? Is it even any of that or something far mor

Death is inevitable. Something that you can't escape. Something that will happen to each and every one of us someday. Some of us fear it, and the rest, doesn't even think about it. The ones who have lost someone, would definitely feel this in a more deeper level. We are not afraid of dying but we are afraid of losing the people that we love. We couldn't even imagine it till it happens to us. We can only wish that none of us goes through that pain, but we have no control over it. It's all in God's hands. We would pray so hard for our parents, our love ones to live a longer life and we are not afraid of the thought of them leaving because we are so confident that they are not, at least not any time soon. That was what I thought too. At least not now. Someday but not now. What I never expected in a million years is that I'm gonna be losing my dad when I was 21 years old, but I did. Something that I wish I could turn back time and maybe, I could have saved him. Mayb

My Amma turns 55 today and the more she ages, the more worried we get. It gets even more worse when you have lost a parent. I never thought I would feel this. Everyone would feel in such way at one point but I never expected it to be now. Death has become a sensitive issue for me, personally.  But we as humans only will realise it once it's too late, once they are gone from our lives. When we feel the loss and pain of a person so close to us and that's when we would value the living ones more because we can't bear to lose them too. It will break us in a most unimaginable way. Even though I am broken, I am strong and I am strong because of my Amma. At a young age we had to go through a broken family and now, the loss of my Appa where none of us have recovered from it yet, but if we have turned out well then the entire credit goes to my Amma. This woman raised us to be independent, responsible, and a strong individual. She's the only reason why I'm still here and we a

I know I've been blaming you for these past few days especially when I'm so hurt and broken because of something else. I blamed you for what you have done. If you have been a proper dad then we wouldn't be suffering this way. I wouldn't be having the thought that my relationship would be like yours too. That was the only thing I prayed so badly from before that my relationship should never be like my parents. My biggest fear, you could say. Lately, I came across this article by Natalia Lusinski titled, "How your relationship with your dad can affect your love life." "If you had a great relationship with your dad, you will most likely have few struggles in your relationships with men,” said Shirani M. Pathak. “If you didn’t have such a great relationship with your dad, expect to find yourself struggling in your relationships with men.” So this was going on in my mind quite sometime because it made sense. At least a little. But why am I talking about this

09.06.1955 - When the clock strikes twelve, there will always be a phone call from us wishing you 'Happy Birthday' but this time onwards there will be none because you are no longer with us. Just the thought of it causes me so much pain. I was dreading of this day for the amount of pain I'll be going through and to be honest, I didn't want to go through it at all but I have no choice because I can't escape it either. So I'm sitting here with tears in my eyes, and the pain that aches in my heart writing you this because there's nothing else that I can do, but this. I'm not just going through this today, but every other day too, and this month especially, I'll be going through it twice because after this it's Father's Day. Your face is fading away from my memories and I only have pictures to get reminded by which at the same time is keeping those memories of you alive for me. I wish it wasn't that way at all. I wish all of us would still ha

To the one who has her heart,  She remembers the first time she got to know you, the first time you kissed her, the first time she gave love another chance, the first time you were crazy for her, the first time you held her hands, the first time you listened to her talk for hours, the first date where the both of you were surrounded with music, lights, and a Ferris wheel, the first time you made her fall in love with you and the first time you made her feel she finally found her one. For her, you are her whole world and without you, she does not exist either. You mean so much to her. You are her home, family and her person. She's the happiest and luckiest girl ever. And she also remembers her first fight with you and how it got worse from there onwards. How another person can ruin what you both have. Those were her worst times. She didn't even know how she went through it. Everything feels a little surreal, at times. She went through a lot of pain, physically, mentally, and e