Will she be saved or will it be too late?

People think she's full of shit. They think the things she say and do are just for attention. They think she is happy because that's how they see her, but what they don't know is that's how she lets them to see her. She don't tell them what's going on with her because they can never understand. So she keeps it all bottled up in her. Even if she did find that one person that she thinks she could tell everything to, she realised she is so wrong about it. They often failed to realise that it's usually not just one thing that makes them that way. It usually starts with one thing and ends up with everything else that's been going wrong in their life. You don't tell them it's just a small matter so don't stress up about it but that's the thing, isn't it? It's not stress we are talking about. It's never ending sadness that leads to overthinking, depression and then anxiety and when it's too late, suicide. It gets worse every time. So if someone you know are suicidal or self harming or just having those thoughts, you may never know how it feels like, you might think it's ridiculous but don't say and show them that. They came to you for a reason. Help them. Listen. Make them feel better after they have done talking to you not even more worse. Not that they think they rather keep it all inside. They don't know she's hurting. They see her smiling but behind that smile, there's a part of her they will never know. Every day it is difficult for her. She don't know why is this happening to her and how can she stop this. She is lost. And lonely. No matter how much she tries, she feels like it's pointless. Nothing is gonna change. She hopes day and night that it would get better, that she will find the meaning to her life. She can only hope. She started to wish that she never had this life. She wished it ended. She wanted to end it on her own but she don't have the heart to leave her family behind because they are broken too and without her, it will kill them. So she's going on with her life without a choice. Without a purpose. To save them, she can't end her pain but how she wished she could. She has suicidal thoughts. Some days she can't even avoid them no matter how much she tries. So she'd just lay there and let it hit her little by little and then altogether. Sad songs are her go-to because she feels connected somehow. Some days it gets a little bit harder than the others. To stop the killing, the pain, she hurts herself. Because physical pain is nothing compares to the pain she feels inside. She realised she's not normal. There's something so wrong with her. There are times she thought to herself that she needed help. All she ever wanted is to be completely happy but happiness seems very far away from her. She never stopped trying. Every day a little bit more harder but it seems useless. She still feels the same. But she does wanna get better. She wants to be able to get out of this but she just don't know how anymore. She just needs something to numb the pain away but what could? She asked herself, "How can I ever get out of this? How to get better? How to stop this never ending pain? How?" When everything else is going so bad in her life, she thought love could save her from it all? But can it though? Can love save her from it? Can anything or anyone save her from it? Or will it just be the trigger to end it all? She just want one solid good thing in her life so that she can hold on to it and climb out from the black hole that she has been drowning from. That is all that she ever asked for. So can good triumph evil after all? I guess she just has to wait and see about it. Will she be saved or will it be too late?

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